Not Sure If This Is The Right Place To Post This

"G_Body_Man: Sponsored by the number 3" (gbodyman)
05/08/2016 at 23:55 • Filed to: Ramblings Of A Depressed Autistic Lunatic

Some nights I stay up and realize that all I am and all I ever will be is a fuckup. No amounts of bupropion and aripiprazole will ever fix that. So I let my bad decisions and inactions haunt me. In ten years, everyone I know will be some combination of married and parents, and I’ll probably be dead in the back of my truck after a war with my bloodstream. Some nights it feels that time will come sooner than later, and there isn’t anything I can do to stop it. Some nights my chest feels ready to collapse and my brain barely functions anymore. I’m failing 3/4 courses this semester, my life is falling apart underneath me, everyone around me hates me, my chances of getting into college are getting slimmer due to my track record, and it’s looking more and more like I’ll be stuck in a dead-end job in a dead-end town for all of my life. What hope am I supposed to take hold of? The point is that very few people would care if I were dead, so it’s up to me to carry myself on. The problem is, I’m not sure how much longer I can do that for. The Wonder Years for your time.

DISCUSSION (15)

Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo > G_Body_Man: Sponsored by the number 3
05/09/2016 at 00:08

Kinja'd!!!

Maybe this’ll cheer you up.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > G_Body_Man: Sponsored by the number 3
05/09/2016 at 00:09

Could always go to junior/CC and then transfer to a university after two years

G_Body_Man: Sponsored by the number 3 > Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo
05/09/2016 at 00:19

Thanks.

G_Body_Man: Sponsored by the number 3 > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
05/09/2016 at 00:20

Yeah, I guess.

unclevanos (Ovaltine Jenkins) > G_Body_Man: Sponsored by the number 3
05/09/2016 at 00:23

Don’t throw in the towel, everybody fucks up in life. If people graduated on time and had no problems then the purpose of life wouldnt make much sense. A failure isn’t the end of the world.

Veriprix > G_Body_Man: Sponsored by the number 3
05/09/2016 at 00:24

I’m 28 and all I’ve ever felt is like I’ve wasted my life to no end. I barely graduated high school, somehow survived getting shot at in Afghanistan, only to come back and get a college degree with no real purpose of what I’m doing. No matter what, a community college is the way to go, they take anyone and they’re cheap. From there is when you go to a university. I’ve been burned relationship wise, I’m single and still living with my parents. Do I regret anything, nope. It sucks but every moment in my life is an experience I learn from to better myself, I just take it a day at a time and keep existing until the day I find what I really want to do and the right person to be with. For better or worse, it’ll be a hell of a ride.

G_Body_Man: Sponsored by the number 3 > unclevanos (Ovaltine Jenkins)
05/09/2016 at 00:31

I don’t know.

Svart Smart, traded in his Smart > G_Body_Man: Sponsored by the number 3
05/09/2016 at 00:33

“In ten years, everyone I know will be some combination of married and parents.” Yeah, maybe. Who cares. Life isn’t a race, and you don’t get a prize for being married or being parents. Some people get those things and maybe wish they hadn’t, or wish they’d done it differently. You can’t keep comparing yourself to other people. Look at me, 29 and single and renting when most of my peers are getting married, having children, buying houses. Those are markers of success for some people but they don’t apply equally to all people.

The next part gets scary: You can fail classes. No small children will die. You can do things over. It may take time and effort, but you can do it again. Talk to an instructor, talk to an adviser. Be honest. Acknowledge your shortcomings and show an interest in getting it right next time. All you can do is your personal best.

And finally, seriously: If you really don’t have a family member or friend you think you can talk to, call the suicide hotline at (800) 273-8255. You might feel weird. You might feel like you’re a burden. You’re not.

Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo > Veriprix
05/09/2016 at 00:44

Well said, my man; well said.

Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo > G_Body_Man: Sponsored by the number 3
05/09/2016 at 00:44

Gosh , would I love to drive one of those right now, one in really good shape. With an LS engine and quiet mufflers.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > Svart Smart, traded in his Smart
05/09/2016 at 00:55

Yes, all of this.

pImpOfThePerverse > G_Body_Man: Sponsored by the number 3
05/09/2016 at 01:57

Don’t sweat your GPA. You write a good essay.

Ike > G_Body_Man: Sponsored by the number 3
05/09/2016 at 02:55

I spent a great deal of my high school years being a perpetual fuck up, I didn’t go to college, I didn’t truly know who I was until sometime in to my early 20s, it’s hard to put in perspective the trials and tribulations of adolescence, they are hardest things you have done so far with your life, i’m not saying that the stuff you do later will make it seem easier, just that with wisdom in hindsight it will seem more trivial. I don’t think you have to follow anyone else’s path, don’t think that because society wants you to do something you have to do it. Honestly if you don’t want to live where you live this supposed dead end town. It’s fairly Easy to get out and try living a few other places, need time after high school bit of time to to get out and try living a few other places.

Don’t fall into the trap just because yesterday sucked doesn’t mean tomorrow can’t be 1 million times better.

-signed a middle of the class highshcool fuck up, community college drop out making really good money now.

Ps if this is a little rambling I'm just about to go to bed, i get a bit up in my head sometimes and can't sleep well to this day.

My bird IS the word > G_Body_Man: Sponsored by the number 3
05/09/2016 at 03:10

We’ve been over this dude. Make a change! Shit don't get better on its own, and unfortunately, some people just have to work much harder than they should have to. Anything worth anything in this world you gotta take. She doesn't give much up on her own.

Pickup_man > G_Body_Man: Sponsored by the number 3
05/09/2016 at 12:24

Sounds like you’re still in high school, and everyone here who’s gone through high school will probably agree that high school’s the fucking worst. You’re stuck in the same place day after day with a bunch of shitty kids. My advice is this, get through it anyway you can, and ask your teachers for help if you are struggling with classes, they’re there to help, and regardless of what you may think, they want to help you, they enjoy it, that’s why they’re there. I know this because after struggling in college for several years I finally started talking to my teachers and my work improved a ton. After high school the world is a completely different place, you’re no longer forced to be in the same building day after day with those same shitty people, and instead you start meeting new people, people who share your interests, your ideas, your values. I had a couple of good friends in high school, and was lucky enough to remain good friends with a few of them, but the people I met in college, we literally call each other family. You will find these people too, trust me.

My second piece of advice is to find something that you enjoy doing, and find a way to do that for a living. It may not necessarily be the thing you’re most passionate about in life, but it should be something that you enjoy. This doesn’t mean you have to go to college, or even a tech school, so don’t put too much pressure on yourself. If what you want to do requires higher education, I highly recommend it, but it isn’t necessary for everything. Just find what you enjoy doing, and go from there.

My third piece of advice is this; More people care than you think. We had a girl commit suicide while I was in high school and it brought the entire school, and our entire small town to a stop. They had to move the funeral to the school gym to fit everyone in. More people care than you think. I care, and I guarantee that everyone here on Oppo cares as well. More people care than you think.

Life is tough at times, but there is always hope. Sometimes finding it is difficult, but it’s always worth the effort.